Resolve to be Happy!

Resolve to be happy!

Resolve to be Happy!

As the new year approaches many people make their new year resolution. Resolutions comes out a place of personal unhappiness. I challenge you to resolve to be happy in 2012…which isn’t as easy as it may sound because it requires you to realize and embrace that you are the only person who can make you happy.

According Dr. William Glasser, happiness or mental health is enjoying the life you are choosing to live, getting along well with the people near and dear to you, doing something with your life you believe is worthwhile and not doing anything to deprive anyone else of the same chance for happiness.

Symptoms of unhappiness are depression, anxiety, phobias and anger. Many people turn to prescription drugs for help or even alcohol, illegal drugs, food or sex to correct their unhappiness. These may initial give you a lift but if the underlying problem with yourself, your relationship or your belief system is not addressed, you won’t feel better.

In an attempt to solve unhappiness people often turn to blaming. Blaming their spouse, blaming their circumstances, their friends, their parents, their children, their weight, their job or anything.  Blaming doesn’t solve anything.

Choosing leads to solving problems. When a person blames or depresses it is self-defeating and leads to an increased sense of helplessness. However, choosing to do something about what you are not happy about is empowering.

Often people don’t know how to start making better choices because they lack the skills, are afraid to ask for help and be perceived as weak or ill or don’t know where to turn.

Mentally healthy people don’t accept unhappiness but rather see it as a warning sign that something  needs to change and they look inward to see what they can change. They look inward because they are aware that they can’t change what anyone else does; they can only change what they do.

A professional counselor can help give you the skills and tools to regain internal control, stop blaming others and help you find your path to happiness. A professional counselor has a master’s degree with at least 6+years of training, usually passes national exams, continuing education courses and supervision. They can help you stop self-defeating patterns and improve important relationships.

All in the Family Counselling counsellors believe in helping people improve their relationship and their lives. Don’t let fear stop you from getting the life you want to live. Call us to find out how we can help you improve yourself or important relationships.

Tammy M. Fontana, MS NCC

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